Much of Him

I've not been feeling well for the last few days. My neck had been really hurting badly, and that didn't help my attitude at all. I think I was kind of depressed. I'm not exactly sure why. I think it's just Satan's attack on my life. Seems like every time I attempt to stay really close to God, I fall away even farther. Suddenly, everything becomes harder. I guess that's a good sign that I'm doing the right thing. If Satan doesn't want me to do it, and does everything in his power to hamper me, then it's probably the best thing to keep doing.
And so I plod along, trying to stay close to God, realizing that I keep trying to do it from my own power, and starting over again.

Don't get me wrong. I wouldn't trade this life for just almost anything. The only thing I might trade it for is the same essential life that I have now, just without all the stupid mistakes that I've made in the past, and I wish I could have never done. I may feel depressed every once in a while, when I again discover that I CAN'T do it on my own, and then for a while, my pride gets the best of me, before I finally turn again to my Saviour, and start afresh. That's the wonderful thing about my Saviour. No matter how many times you mess up, make mistakes, or are just plain stupid, God is still there, waiting to forgive you, and to forget your sins.
I couldn't decide whether to post the words to East to West, or Much of You...since the lyrics to East to West are scrolling to the right of this post anyway, I've decided on Much of You.

How could I stand here and watch the sun rise
Follow the mountains where they touch the sky
Ponder the vastness and the depths of the sea
And think for a moment the point of it all was to make much of me
Cause I'm just a whisper and You are the thunder and

I want to make much of You, Jesus
I want to make much of Your love
I want to live today to give You the praise
That You alone are so worthy of
I want to make much of Your mercy
I want to make much of Your cross
I give You my life
Take it and let it be used
To make much of You

And how can I kneel here
And think of the cross
The thorns and the whip and the nails and the spear
The infinite cost
To purchase my pardon
And bear all my shame
To think I have anything worth boasting in except for Your name
Cause I am a sinner
And You are the Savior

I want to make much of You, Jesus
I want to make much of Your love
I want to live today to give You the praise
That You alone are so worthy of
I want to make much of Your mercy
I want to make much of Your cross
I give You my life
Take it and let it be used

To make much of You

This is Your love, oh God
Not to make much of me
But to send Your own son
So that we could make much of You

For all eternity

I want to make much of You Jesus
I want to make much of Your love
I want to live today to give You the praise
That You alone are so worthy of
I want to make much of Your mercy
I want to make much of Your cross
I give You my life
Take it and let it be used
To make much of You

I want to make much of You
Much of You Jesus

~ Steven Curtis Chapman